Andy Ramblings

Received this via e-mail ... Only The Irish can come up with something like this!

Rob is a commercial saturation diver for Global Divers in Mayo (IRELAND).

He performs underwater repairs on offshore drilling rigs. Below is anemail sent to his sister. She then sent it to RnaG (Irish radio station) in Galway, who was sponsoring a worst job experience contest. Needless to say, she won.

Hi Sue,

Just another note from your bottom-dwelling brother. Last week I had a bad day at the office. I know you've been feeling down lately at work, so thought I would share my dilemma with you to make you realise it's not so bad after all.

Before I can tell you what happened to me, I first must bore you with a few technicalities of my job. As you know, my office lies at the bottom of the sea. I wear a suit to the office. It's a wet suit.

This time of year the water is quite cool. So what we do to keep warm is this: We have a diesel powered industrial water heater. This £20,000 piece of equipment sucks the water out of the sea. It heats it to a delightful temperature. It then pumps it down to the diver through a garden hose, which is taped to the air hose Now this sounds like a darn good plan, and I've
used it several times with no complaints. Read More

Especially when they when they are blindingly honest and give such obvious answer to deep meaning full questions.

Here is a list of little questions that kids to God to ask those deep questions.

(these are verbatim with all spelling)

Dear God
We read Thos Edison made light. But in Sun school they said you did it, so I bet he stole your Idea.
Sincerly
Donna

---

Dear God
Instead of letting people die and having to make new ones why don't you keep the ones you got now?
Jane

---

Dear God
I went to this wedding and they kissed right in Church, Is this alright?
Neil Read More

your'e either covering it,

laughing it off,

kicking it,

kissing it

busting it

trying to get a piece of it,

behaving like one,

Or you live with one!

The Chinese premier is visting the UK.

Prescot meets him and mentions that they have just lost a vote on 90 days. The chinese premier replies, What's a vote?

Have you ever wondered what your PC gets upto when your not looking?

To find out the battle of the Icons ... taaadaaaa!!! Click image to go to the battle.

A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales,                   
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human  because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.  The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale. Irritated,   the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.

The little girl said, "When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah".The teacher asked,
  "What if Jonah went to hell?"                                           
                                                                          
  The little girl replied, "Then you ask him".     

---

A Kindergarten teacher: was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.                                                           

As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was.
The girl replied, "I'm drawing God."
The teacher paused and said, "But no one knows what God looks like."
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied,

"They will in a minute."

---

The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to  persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
"Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'

  A small voice at the back of the room rang out,
 "And there's the teacher, she's dead." Read More

Butt Ugly!?


Click for bigger image if you dare

Check this out!
A fireball almost destroys a truck somewhere in south Florida. Must be near the Cap or something.

Click here to download (Will open new window)

Ten Top Things That Sound Dirty At The Office, But Aren't:

10. I need to whip it out by 5.
9. Mind if I use your laptop?
8. Put it in my box before you leave.
7. If I have to lick one more, I'll gag!
6. I want it on my desk, NOW!
5. HMMMMMMMMMM, I think it's out of fluid.
4. My equipment is so old it takes forever to finish.
3. It's an entry level position.
2. When do you think you'll be getting off today?
1. It's not fair...I do all the work while he just sits there.